Let's have some fun, people.

If you are reading this, you have signed the fun pact.

We want fun.
12:31 p.m. ... I'll kick this thing off by putting all my picks down. You won't be reading this because you are likely at an OTB or in the company of loved ones. But if you're as miserable as I am, you will need to look at some picks and watch the horses run.

Juvenile Turf

1. Wilcox Inn
2. Mantoba
3. Utley

Sprint, this is my favorite race. I love hard-knockin' sprints. I love watching sprinters. They're so ballistic!

1. Cash Refund
2. Hamazing Destiny
3. Big Drama

Turf Sprint ... boring ...

1. Chamberlain's Bridge
2. Rose Catherine
3. Silver Timber

Juvenile, it's not who you think will win the Derby, it's who you think will win the Juvenile.

1. Uncle Mo
2. Boys of Tosconova
3. Stay Thirsty

Mile, I'm also a big, big fan of turf races and this promises to be a blanket finish

1. Court Vision
2. Goldikova
3. Sydney's Candy

Dirt Mile

1. Tizway
2. Here Comes Ben
3. Vineyard Haven

Turf

1. Winchester
2. Behkabad
3. Al Kahli

Classic, the big one.

1. Quality Road
2. Blame
3 Lookin' At Lucky

That's it. We're already dead on our early Pick 4. I hate horse racing. Worst. Breeders' Cup. Ever.

2:07 ... We are alive to Cash Refund and Big Drama in the Pick 3 and started the Pick 4 with Pluck. We're in good shape here, but we know the crushing nature of this game.

Man, that Three Chimney's commercial gets me so pumped up. Who's with me?

2:33 ... BIG DRAMA! We hit the Pick 3 and are still alive in the Pick 4 and another Pick 3. Just gotta keep this rollin'. Now it's time to finish my cigar.

3:02 ... So here's the deal. We're alive to the one, five, and nine in our Pick 4 and the one, five, seven, and nine for the second leg of another Pick 3.

This race is nerve wracking. As if turf races aren't hard enough, a turf sprint is just nauseating. Thankfully there's a balcony to our suite.

I need to hear that Three Chimney's commercial again.

3:21 ... Thank you, Three Chimney's for airing that commercial after Chamberlain Bridge smashed into the front. We are alive to Uncle Mo and Boys of Tosconova in the Pick 4, the Pick 3, and we're alive to the second leg of another Pick 3.

Boom! Boom! Boom!

3:58 ... Mo ... Mo ... Mo ... Hit our Pick 4! Hit two Pick 3's.

How good did Uncle Mo look? That was such a mature win. He rated. That's patience, that's what you need to win Classics. That's how you win Belmonts and Derbys. That time of 1:42 is awfully salty too.

Get your Derby Future Bets together, that's a Classic horse.

4:32 ... I have a new favorite owner in Uncle Mo's owner. I've spent the past five minutes trying to find out his name, but my Internet is about as slow as Life at Ten with a cramp.

The fact that he said that, "I'm going to get so drunk tonight," makes him an instant favorite personality. Did you catch how offended Jeremy Schapp was with it? One, the tone of his voice had an edge and two, he was looking at his feet as if his wife's rear was slapped by a rival.

Awesome stuff.

5:48 ... ALL. ALL. ALL. ALL. That is the only thing that saved us in the Dirt Mile. 37-1 helps the cause and keeps us alive in the Pick 3. The Pick 4 is dead.

We've only got a couple more. I went "heavy" on Quality Road. I have some exactas and tri surrounding QR. I hope he doesn't freak out in the gate today.

6:14 ... We're alive in the Pick 3 to both Quality Road and Zenyatta. That's exciting for a couple reasons: 1. We're in a position to still route for Zenyatta and 2. if Zen loses we cash in big time.

7:44 ... That was certainly a heartbreaker.

This was Zen's greatest challenge. And you know what? She lived up to it. She lost a hoof's length.

Great weekend. At once I said that she will be the most disappointing 19-1 horse ever, but I don't feel that way anymore. She's awesome. So too was Blame.